Sometimes life gives you weeks where the days just pass. It is not like you are passing your TIME. It just seems that TIME is passing you by. Cause most of things you do and the thoughts you have, seem uninspired. They actually may be quite insightful and perceptive, but since you've had them before, they're old news for you. Every second seems to drag, not because you're getting bored. What you're doing excites you and its fun, but it just seems bland compared to what you've done, what you've achieved. Your mind picks up on these things and you contemplate - a change of setting, a change of lifestyle, a peek into a friend's life. Your mind gives you these thoughts and avenues for change. It lives a life of its own- uncluttered, imaginative and rebellious. Yet in its form, it is melancholy, half and fake excitement. Cause you know you're supposed to do something today. A plan, an agenda, a purpose is there. And you know your mind has to fulfill these responsibilities and purposefully do its duty, thus resulting in no excitement that the 21st century wandering and waving mind is capable of experiencing.
Isn't that what we all crave? Perpetual excitement? Actually being able to LIVE every second the same way. Energized, driven and with no fear. But what happens is that sometimes the mind tends to move into a zone of loneliness and disconnect. Not for the lack of company, even compelling company at that, but for the lack of a fresher perspective, a reason to do and a change from the sustained level of excitement currently.
What really intrigues me is when the mind starts to accept this current zone of loneliness and disconnect. At what point do you, as an adventurous, potent and agile person start to accept, that, ya, THIS is MY LIFE. This is what im going to do. This is all I can achieve in my years. I can't conquer everything. I cant be the Master of All. Cause we've been taught to never give in, never underestimate ourselves and never stop being ambitious. Cause we're taught never to be content, to strive to be better and greater, to learn from others. For the honest, uncomplicated and simple mind, this is an impossible task. The honest mind views itself for what it is, that is, it is not the best. No matter how far you go, there always is that final hurdle, final mountain to be climbed, some person to beat, some desire to accomplish. This brings me to my next question.
Are human beings really bottomless pits of need? Is that our curse for being different from the animals? Is our ego the bane and boon of our existence? Cause we cant keep it simple. There are just too many on this planet for us to keep it simple. May be the cavemen could keep it simple. Just eat, hunt, make love to their woman, fight and sleep. Maybe that was a simpler TIME, a TIME where everything didn't have to be understood, it was obvious. But then, what screwed it up, what cataclysm made it into the multi-layer, intricately framed world of today? As i keep thinking about this, an answer comes to my mind. Maybe evolution is the culprit. Human beings used their intelligence to evolve. And in the process we lost most of our simplicity. We trained to be practical, use reasoning and deduce things. But do our minds really move just like our bodies do? Can we always be reasonable and use our intelligence to benefit us? In fact, is thinking really action? Aren't these two inter-linked? Cause you can think while acting and you can act while thinking. Could i even write an article about something as innate as this if i wasnt using my brain? What would i write if i allowed myself to switch my conscious brain off??
Isnt it ironic that im talking about not using my brain while im using it? Furthermore, would i realize that i should not be using my brain if i wasnt using it in the first place? How and when would i have come to this realization? And doesnt not using my brain prevent me from such other realizations?
Hahahahaaaaaaaaaaaaaa. Hahahahahaaa
Just while writing the above 2 paragraphs, i realize that this is why writers go mad, kill themselves and are such maniacs :) Cause they want answers, and they want them ASAP. Their mind is their canvas and their prison. They carry too much baggage, mentally, and are always looking to justify disposing it. But they like the baggage, they can tangibly associate it with the materialistic world. As a layman would call it, that's what makes them think differently. They are so stuck in their minds, that they exist in many lifetimes and dimensions. That their mind takes them places where they cant go. And ironically, it is because of this preoccupation with the mind, that they rarely go to places.
Recognizing why and how a person thinks is a key to world domination. I'll repeat. Recognizing why and how a person thinks is a key to world domination.
Its just that very few writers actually use this key for their own benefit. That is what they are against. Its breaks an invisible line in their head.
Lol. Now, im sleepy. Too much psychobabble for today. Gnite.
Did u mean to say dat our mind is a canvas coz it tks us to places whr we want to go..even if we cant go...nd a prison coz it feels lk to b in one when u desperately need some answers..??
ReplyDelete..nd ya i believe evolution is the culprit!
mujhe kuch samaj me nahin aaya,,gandhi so jaa :):P
ReplyDeleteWell, there are those who posit that the true meaning of Genesis is, as you say, a loss of simplicity. Eating the fruit of the tree of Knowledge meant that man was thrown out of eden. However, another philosophy, that of buddhism, states that only man can attain Nibbana, or freedom from the suffering that you talk about. Since only man, with the dual faculties afforded by a developed brain and a central nervous system, can recognize, and more importantly, experience, this very dissatisfaction that you speak about.
ReplyDeleteThis is interesting. The Buddha spoke about all life as 'dukkha', essentially dissatisfying. His exact words were :
Birth is dukkha, old age is dukkha,
illness is dukkha, death is dukkha,
not getting (or experiencing) what one wants is dukkha,
getting (or experiencing) what one does not want is dukkha,
In short, attachment to the five aggregates of body and mind is dukkha.
Aditya, people are faced with numerous questions, and believe that the answers will satisfy them. People are faced with numerous feelings, and believe that having those feelings all the time will satisfy them. However, some teachers realise that the nature of this world, this life, is dissatisfaction. The sooner one accepts this fact, and smiles at it, one feels peace.
Now, If I may go out on a limb, this is what I believe:
We will never be smart enough, rich enough, strong enough. We will never have enough sex, enough comfort, enough intellectual stimulation. This is not unnatural, there is no secret key that will make this not-so. This is the way this world works, a natural law. Even if the objects of our pleasure, be they experiences, sensations or thoughts, do not change, our ability to find pleasure in them does (as you point out). This is natural, this is normal, and realising this does not need to make you insane, unhappy and anti-social. Realising and accepting this should make you humble, caring, and compassionate. It is the fact that we rebel against this law that does the damage.
Hmmmmm... you make some interesting points Suraj. Dissatisfaction is the root of all the negative thinking that does flow in one's mind. That is surely true. However, doesn't existing for all eternity being dissatisfied seem a little too pessimistic? I know, you might say that pessimism has no business in the practical observations of humans, but aren't happiness, satisfaction, pride and perfection the things that we live and work for? Cause if 'dukkha' is the reality of life, there isn't any difference between a lifelong beggar and a corporate magnate. They might both be living different lives, but yet both experience the same dukkha.
ReplyDeleteMaybe a certain age or stage in life can be reached where one is free of this dukkha, when happiness is achieved. Cause i dont think most people can accept discontent, smile and just live on. They'll lose most of their motivation to work if faced with such a scenario.
What can be thought of as a middle path is that, dukkha, dissatisfaction, insecurity, fears and ambitions are all related to the past or the future. They are just avatars of situations we have experienced in the past and situations our minds want to experience. That causes a loss of focus on the present. And this loss causes that eternal, internal conflict that we humans are in. Our minds are elsewhere, but our bodies are there. Just like an engineering lecture (kinda lame metaphor, but whatever :p). If Man can just access into his present and shut the doors on his history and his dreams, then that SIMPLE LIFE that we crave for can be achieved. COMPARTMENTALIZATION is the right word.
I also believe this is what makes certain people mentally stronger than others. They can focus their energies on the present and create wonderful situations, rather than looking over their shoulders or beyond their realm of imagination for that silver lining. Wat say??